Medically CitedOverview
An ancient practice of meating in the spiritual traditions of Hinduism and Buddhism, has transcended centuries to become a profound method for deepening intimacy and improving sexual fulfillment. This includes deep breathing, meditation, and mindful touch, the spiritual and emotional connection between partners as much as the physical.
Through tantric techniques, couples can explore their sexual energy in a more profound and meaningful way, leading to heightened states of pleasure, intimacy, and spiritual awareness.
Beyond the anecdotal evidence supporting the benefits of tantric practices, recent research from top academic institutions has begun to illuminate its positive effects. Studies from universities such as Harvard and Stanford have noted that mindfulness and meditation—core components of tantric sex—can significantly improve emotional well-being and relationship satisfaction.
Meanwhile, research from the Kinsey Institute has explored how the intentional, slow approach to touch and intimacy championed by tantric sex can enhance sexual satisfaction and emotional connection between partners. These studies underscore the ancient wisdom of tantric practices, reaffirming their value in contemporary sexual and emotional wellness.
What is Tantric Sex?
Tantric Sex. Shutterstock Image
Tantric sex is a centuries-old practice originating from the spiritual traditions of Hinduism and Buddhism, designed to transform sexual activity into a sacred, intimate experience. It emphasizes the importance of mental presence, deep breathing, and slow, mindful movements to forge a profound emotional and spiritual connection between partners.
Unlike traditional views of sexuality, which often focus purely on physical pleasure, tantric sex prioritizes the flow of sexual energy and emotional intimacy. [1]
This approach not only aims to enhance the depth of sexual experiences but also to cultivate a greater sense of closeness and understanding between partners, contributing to a more harmonious and fulfilling relationship overall. Tantra is very playful and should be approached in a joyful, light-hearted way.
The lovers remain curious and keep exploring new positions and ways to touch each other, knowing that there is no right or wrong way. They enjoy movement but also embrace stillness as a beautiful way to deepen their sensitivity and to absorb all the pleasure and arousal they’re experiencing.
How to Perform Tantric Sex to Experience Long Lasting Pleasure?
At its core, tantric sex is an ancient practice that combines deep breathing, meditation, and mindful, intimate touch to form a spiritual connection between partners, transcending the purely physical aspect of sex to enhance emotional intimacy and spiritual growth.
1. Create a Magical Space
Turn your bedroom/living area/backyard/etc. into a temple of love. Tidy up and spread comfortable blankets and cushions, bring light incense sticks, flowers or diffuse essential oils, buy fruit and drinks you both enjoy. Create a feast for the senses!
Don’t use the ceiling lights as they’re usually too harsh. Instead, bring dimmed table lamps or plenty of candles, their flickering will bring magic into the place. Put soft, relaxing music on that will play for at least 2 hours so that you don’t need to be interrupted by resetting it. Make sure that the temperature is just right for both of you to be naked.
2. Clear Your Minds
If you’re familiar with the art of meditation, start with 5-10 minutes of meditative practice. Otherwise, simply close your eyes and start breathing deeply, slowly, into your belly. Consciously letting go of any thoughts, worries, and stresses with each exhale will help you both become much more mindful and present in the moment.
When we try to connect intimately right after a busy day, often the energy of our full-on schedules will keep pulling us away from each other, as thoughts about work, tasks and other commitments will enter our minds. A few minutes of conscious, abdominal breathing will help you both push all the distractions away and remain much more present with each other.
3. Eye-Gaze
Look deeply into each other’s eyes using a soft, gentle gaze. You’re allowed to blink and close your eyes if you need to, this exercise should not be an effort.
Look into the left eye of your beloved (and instruct them to do the same) as the left eye is more receptive, it is the gateway to the soul. You can also try the right eye to see if it feels better – there is no right or wrong here.
Set the alarm on your phone and try to eye-gaze between 5 and 15 minutes. This might seem like a long time at first until you really connect and when this connection will feel wonderful and delicious. A prolonged eye contact induces a mild state of altered consciousness which is a truly blissful experience. To enhance the exercise, synchronize your breathing so that you inhale and exhale at the same time.
4. Open Your Hearts to Each Other
When your bodies meet on a purely physical level – you have sex. But when you mix your pleasure and arousal with your loving, emotional energy – you create love-making.
My clients report over and over again that the most fulfilling and magical sexual experiences happen when both partners connect with the love they feel for each other when their hearts are open and receptive when it’s not just their bodies that meet but also their hearts and souls.
Take turns telling each other what you love about each other. Be specific, recall particular instances when your partner made you feel loved, cared for and nurtured.
Dig deep into your heart, allow yourself to feel all the love you have for each other and then let the words of appreciation, gratitude and joy flow between the two of you.
5. Sit in Yab-Yum
Yab-Yum is a traditional tantric position intended to bring lovers close in a deeply sensual, intimate way. The man sits down comfortably (usually in a cross-legged position) and his partner sits in his lap facing him and embracing him with her arms and legs. Both can be clothed or naked. [2]
As they synchronize their breathing and look into each other’s eyes, they allow this deep experience of the union to grow and deepen. There is nothing to do, nothing to achieve in this beautiful embrace. The lovers hold each other for the pure joy and bliss of being together, of appreciating and celebrating this special moment.
6. Share a Tantric Kiss
Still sitting in Yab-Yum, bring your lips close together but not touching yet. This time, alternate your breathing so that one partner is inhaling while the other one is exhaling. Savor and delight in the experience of breathing each other’s breath. After a while allow your lips to gently brush against your partner’s lips and skin.
Finally, bring your lips together in a soft, slow, gentle kiss. Don’t make any sudden movements, simply savor the kiss as you keep caressing your beloved’s lips with your own. Remain completely present with this experience, immersed in the pleasure, sensuality, and intimacy of the moment.
Tantric Sex Experience Shutterstock Image
7. Make Love
Start touching and caressing each other slowly, gently, mindfully. Remember that tantric lovemaking is not about chasing an orgasm but about being in pleasure together, fully present and connected throughout the experience. Allow your bodies to relax as you move together in an intimate dance of passion and arousal. Let go of any goals and simply enjoy the playfulness and intimacy of your time together.
Tantric lovemaking can include penetration and orgasm or can simply be an experience of touching, massaging, kissing and pleasuring each other. Let go of any scripts, let go of ideas of what should happen in the bedroom. Allow the intimacy to happen in a conscious respectful way. Simply follow the pleasure, seek your partner’s feedback and have fun! [3]
The tantric lovemaking is a celebration throughout which the lovers acknowledge and enjoy the sacredness of their union, seeing each other as special and divine. Touch and intimacy happen naturally, effortlessly, with full awareness. Lovers do not lose themselves in the experience, disconnecting from each other but remain always present, looking into each other’s eyes and delving deep into each other.
Benefits of Tantric Sex to Burn the Physical Intimacy
1. Improved Emotional Connection
Engaging in tantric practices deepens the emotional bond between partners, fostering a level of intimacy that transcends physical satisfaction.
2. Enhanced Sexual Pleasure:
By focusing on mindful, slow movements and the energy exchange between partners, tantric sex can elevate the sexual experience, making it more satisfying and pleasurable.
3. Stress Reduction:
The meditative aspects of tantric sex, such as deep breathing and mindfulness, contribute to significant reductions in stress and anxiety levels.
4. Increased Self-Awareness:
Practitioners often experience heightened self-awareness and spiritual growth, leading to a more fulfilling sexual and personal life.
5. Better Communication:
Tantra encourages open and honest communication between partners, enhancing trust and understanding in the relationship.
6. Physical Health Benefits:
The practice promotes better physical health through increased flexibility, improved cardiovascular health, and strengthened pelvic muscles.
7. Longer and More Intense Orgasms:
The techniques used in tantric sex can lead to longer, more intense orgasms due to the focus on building up sexual energy and connection. [4]
Conclusion
The ancient practice of tantric sex evokes deep intimacy and enhances physical pleasure. By engaging in mindful breathing, meditation, and deliberate, affectionate touch, partners not only experience heightened sexual experiences but also foster a greater sense of connection and understanding.
The benefits, such as improved emotional bonding, enhanced pleasure, stress reduction, increased self-awareness, better communication, and physical health benefits, highlight the significant impact tantric sex can have on individuals and relationships alike. The practice encourages couples to explore their intimacy in a playful, non-judgmental manner, leading to more intense orgasms and a deeper, more meaningful sexual experience.
In a world where the pace of life can often disconnect us from ourselves and our partners, tantric sex serves as a powerful tool to reconnect, rediscover, and revitalize our sexual and emotional lives.
4 Sources
We review published medical research in respected scientific journals to arrive at our conclusions about a product or health topic. This ensures the highest standard of scientific accuracy.
[1] Venkatraman A, Nandy R, Rao SS, Mehta DH, Viswanathan A, Jayasundar R. Tantra and Modern Neurosciences: Is there any Correlation? Neurol India. 2019 Sep-Oct;67(5):1188-1193. doi: 10.4103/0028-3886.271263. PMID: 31744942.[2] "What are Tantric Sex Positions?" WebMD, 23 Apr. 2024, www.webmd.com/sex/what-are-tantric-sex-positions.
[3] Gentry, M. "(355) Harnessing the Power of Tantric Practices: A Revolutionary Path to Enhanced Sexual Well-being and Transformation." J. Sex. Med., vol. 21, no. Supplement_1, 1 Feb. 2024, p. qdae001.340, doi:10.1093/jsxmed/qdae001.340.
[4] Safron A. What is orgasm? A model of sexual trance and climax via rhythmic entrainment. Socioaffect Neurosci Psychol. 2016 Oct 25;6:31763. doi: 10.3402/snp.v6.31763. PMID: 27799079; PMCID: PMC5087698.
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