“Though it may appear selfish, walking away from a marriage that felt rife with barriers to closeness was a self-loving action. I finally chose honoring myself over loving him. Is that really selfish? Yes, I suppose it is in a way. But it wasn’t bad. All my life I had been selfless, putting myself second, and for once I wanted to come first. Even though I knew the price would be discomfort and pain, for who knew how long, before I became truly happy. And it turned out that the following months would be the toughest in my life.
I left our home that morning with a bag of clothes and headed for my father’s home. This was one of the hardest things I had ever done – walk away from someone I loved. Allow someone to hurt in order to give him the happiness he deserved. Rouse him from this fake white-picket-fenced world, to awaken in the cold reality of brokenness and hurt. I had always fought for love; this time it looked like I was doing the complete opposite. In reality, though, I was loving more than I ever had.”
“Everything looked appealing on the surface. In the depths of my being, I felt a cold hollowness, which I knew was not good for my soul. This feeling underlined the foundation of my life for the next twenty years.
I ached for what lay hidden beyond my false reality—that which was alive and powerful, that which had connection, meaning, and purpose. Was it gone for good? I’d embark on a lifelong adventure to find it again. I don’t know how I knew, but I had a feeling and a knowing that I would discover truth to feed my soul with purpose and eventually, life would feel good once more.”
“In my momentary blankness, I had received an answer from somewhere beyond the veils. I trusted, without a doubt, my gut feeling, my intuition, and the words given to me from guides on the other side. I had to go with it, no matter how random, crazy, or wrong it may have appeared. I asked for guidance; they had responded. So I trusted. Faith is blind. And at times like this, you need to hold on and continue believing. I surrendered to the flow, which is scary as hell sometimes, and this was definitely one of those times.”
Everyone Has Fears
“I exited the train and the second my foot touched the platform, it hit me. Oh my God, what kind of fool am I to travel to a foreign place alone? I have no clue where I am. Fear, an unexpected, mighty force took me over. It crippled my thinking. The music stopped playing. I felt so small and weak…lost. I’m alone. Puny little me, believing I could be bigger than I am. What was I thinking? My power completely stripped from my being, I lost the ability to utter a single French word. In fact, I forgot how to speak altogether. I forgot how to listen and trust my instincts, how to be brave. I forgot how to be. Fear paralyzed me.”
“Soul mates are not always romantic. They are our brothers, sisters, parents, children, family, friends, teachers, partners, neighbors, the people that come into our lives for a mere season, and those who stay their whole lives…and yes, even those who cross our paths whom we are not our absolute fans of, and vice versa, they are our soul mates, too. All enter our lives based on a soul contract, to help us learn lessons in order to balance our karma and ascend.
So let’s try to understand and forgive them for how they’ve hurt us, and forgive ourselves for how we’ve hurt them. Human beings don’t process correctly or enough, and tend to project fears and insecurities from the past onto present and future interactions – often with those they love the most. And often, people aren’t aware of how they’ve hurt us (or prefer to keep that knowledge out of their consciousness).
I might never get an apology from people who have hurt me in my life, but I would need to do without one if I wanted to move forward and set myself free. In their minds, they have done nothing wrong. However, certain experiences and interactions wounded me. And I needed to understand why they were the way they were, and focus on sending that hurt part of myself, compassion and love, without receiving an apology on their end. Affirming our wounded parts helps us to forgive; self-love strengthens the parts of ourselves that feel weak. Forgiveness is more for YOU than for the other person. Forgive and let go because you love yourself enough to give yourself peace and healing.”
“The deeper I go into my spirituality, the more I realize that the journey to mastery is the journey to mastering oneself. And through each and every one of my experiences, I had to learn what that meant. I had to take control of my life and shift the energy to flow in the way I intended it to go, to consciously create, consciously direct, and consciously move my life based on my own intentions and my own will. When will we realize that we ourselves are the true masters of our fates? We are Gods. When will we stop pretending that we’re not? By stepping into our power and honoring our true nature as creators, the possibilities are endless.
And the sooner we make connecting with our spiritual heart a priority, a constant practice in our daily lives, the sooner it becomes second nature, something we don’t have to think too hard about. Things, events, and people start to show up instantly. You’ll experience magic, and life as you know it will never be the same after that, in a good way. You’ll naturally tune-in to others around you and the world as a whole. Nothing will feel too scary or too big to conquer. Some things may frighten you now and then, but fear will no longer paralyze you, nor will it hold you back.
When we constantly connect with our innermost selves, it becomes effortless to recognize reminders of our truths, validation that we are on the right path, and clues from the Universe and from Spirit as to what path to take, what to create, and how to create. These reminders may be subtle or in disguise as events or particular people who enter our lives. I’ll always be grateful for the people who have shown up in my life to help remind me of my truth, to help move me along in the right direction, and ultimately, to help me learn Love on many different levels.”
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