Sexual performance is exceedingly important to men as it touches on the male ego and natural instincts to procreate. The ability to satisfy your lover, the ability to impregnate a woman and the size of a man’s penis which is often though wrongly associated with sexual ability are part and parcel of masculinity. Human beings are born with sexual instincts. This enables us to attract suitable mates and procreate. Therefore, a man who feels he is a poor sexual performer will probably suffer from low self-esteem. Sexual performance particularly for the male sex is fundamental in the following areas:
- The ability to satisfy a woman and give her orgasms
- The ability to impregnate a woman
- Good sexual performance is a show of sound sexual instincts which can validate and boost* the male ego
What is Poor Sexual Performance?
Poor sexual performance is a rather subjective topic which can largely depend on people’s opinions. However, a man is generally considered to be a poor performer due to the following:
- Inability to give a woman an orgasm
- Inability to get or sustain an erection
- Climaxing too quickly (premature ejaculation)
- Being selfish towards your lover’s need and focusing only on yourself
- Ignoring the initial stages of sexual intercourse that is, foreplay
- Being too distracted during sex thereby not giving your lover your undivided attention
- Being too uptight during sex which can make the experience less sensual
- Inability to spice things up leading to monotonous, routine and boring sex
The list is endless and differs from woman to woman. In addition, poor sexual performance can be due to medical conditions such as erectile dysfunction. In this case, getting medical help should be a priority rather than sitting home and feeling sorry for yourself which will only make the condition worse.
How is Poor Sexual Performance Manifestation?
The stages of sex include the stimulation phase, the plateau phase, the climaxing phase and the resolution phase. Poor sexual performance is especially manifested in the first three phases in the following ways:
- Low libido
- Inability to achieve an orgasm
- Poor lubrication in women which can hinder pleasurable sex
- Painful sex
- Premature ejaculation
What Causes Poor Sexual Performance?
Poor sexual performance in men can be attributed to several factors ranging from physical to psychological. These factors include:
- Hormonal imbalances
- Congenital disorders such as micropenis and Peyronie’s disease
- Excessive alcohol intake
- Small penis size (or, ironically, an excessively large penis)
- Performance anxiety
- Past sexual trauma
- Neurological disorders
- Side effects of certain drugs such as antidepressants
- Medical conditions such as diabetes and heart disease
- Poor body image
- The age factor
The Age Factor
A man is said to be at his sexual peak when he is eighteen years old; it’s all downhill from there. Therefore, age can be attributed to poor or declining sexual performance. This is because, as a man ages, his testosterone levels decline. Testosterone is responsible for a man’s sexual drive. Low levels often result in decreased* interest in sex.
Age can also be attributed to a declined sexual performance as it comes with fatigue and medical conditions that may interfere with a man’s sexual performance. Diseases like diabetes, arthritis and erectile dysfunction can hinder sex by making it either physically uncomfortable or impossible.
What is the Solution for Poor Sexual Performance?
With the right amount of commitment and determination, a man can work on his sexual performance. You can do this irrespective of whether you are single or in a relationship. Granted, being in a relationship can make things more complicated. This is because women are known to pretend they are enjoying sex when their lover is performing poorly. Moreover, being a poor performer can make a man self-conscious which makes him withdraw from his partner rather than talking about the problems he is facing. Nonetheless, poor sexual performance can easily be dealt with in the following ways:
1. Counseling and Sex Therapy:
Talking to an expert can be very assuring and therapeutic either to you as an individual or to a couple. In addition, seeing a sex therapist will have an added advantage of getting sex tips. This can be in the form of sexual positions, foreplay tips, relaxation tips and communication tips. Couples have been known to have a complete turnaround in their sex lives just after a few sessions with a sex therapist. Therefore, if you are having any reservations forget about them and make an appointment.
Poor sexual performance may be due to medical reasons. This can include erectile dysfunction, hormonal imbalances and neurological deficits among others. In this case, the best cause of action is to consult a doctor who will prescribe the right medication to deal with any of these problems.
3. Self-care: Lifestyle Changes:
The body is an interconnected system. This means that your sexual health is dependent on your overall good health. Making lifestyle changes can go a long way in eliminating poor sexual performance.
- Quit smoking
- Reduce* your alcohol intake
- Exercise regularly
- Learn how to do Kegel exercises
- Eliminate* unhealthy foods in your diet such as processed foods
- Drink two liters of water daily
- Eat foods that are known to boost* the male sexual health. These foods include nuts, oily fish, avocados, yoghurt, tomatoes, lean meat and chilies
Expert’s Views on Poor Sexual Performance
Health and sex experts recommend medical checkups to ensure there are no underlying medical conditions causing poor sexual performance. They also recommend lifestyle changes top on the list being quitting smoking. Sex therapists often stress sexual compatibility. This means having a partner with whom you are in sync with emotionally, intellectually and physically. They also recommend being open to new ideas in the bedroom and doing Kegel exercises regularly.
In conclusion, every man will have some bad days every once in a while. If your problems are more chronic than this, do not suffer in silence and worry yourself to death. Poor sexual performance can be dealt with using medication, lifestyle changes and sexual tips from a sex therapist.