Choosing Perspective – Powerful Exercise For Releasing Unwanted Thoughts

Choosing Perspective

Main IMNLP Mind Over Matter

Given that many readers will find some controversy over the process herein, I wish to remind you that you are not your brain.

Therefore, the suggested exercise if performed as instructed will indeed assist in re-programming how your brain is capable of choosing a more positive pattern thereby arriving at a more pleasant outcome from a previously instilled negative loop that may be running presently in the background most likely automatically.

First, let’s begin with some words to help along the way before we arrive at the exercise. These words are also helpful to you even if you do not decide to use the brain hack strategy in this article.

Definitions will help you understand what may have been confusing from so many different sources and allow you to put your thoughts into perspective.

Words To Assist

  • THOUGHTS: Thoughts are only that, thoughts. We, humans, tend to give too much power to our thoughts, and as a result, the body follows along with thoughts, resulting in negative, unhealthy outcomes. It is quite normal for our brain to run a maladaptive thought naturally, then for pleasantries to be recalled.
  • BELIEF: Although we could spend a lot of time in the description of this word, we will sum it up for our purpose by comparing to a computer program and call it “data input.”
  • PERCEPTION: Your senses are influenced both by your thoughts and beliefs along with unique only to you, set of values. Determining how your thoughts are given to beliefs, then determines how one “perceives.”
  • Perception Reality
  • LABELING: The process of finding words to identify an emotion, perception of something or someone and putting a name to it. Example: “I feel unworthy” or “All cats are scary.”
  • REFRAME: Change in a “perception” from a deceptive brain message of importance that with discovery may be found in impulses, and urges, that keep coming forth and require a “refocus” in order to gain proper perspective
  • REFOCUS: Directing attention toward an activity or more productive mental process by learning how to change a negative to a more positive result will serve you much better
  • REVALUE: Clearly see thoughts for what they are through the steps of discovery and deciding which ones are serving you well, which should be sorted out to gain more value and clarity.

This is determined to be “true” for you, and uniquely yours to choose from Based on these definitions, it is my hope that you will come to understand that normally a person does have an opportunity to choose what they can pay attention to.

All of us get off track at some point in our lives, and when we feel we have trouble sorting out things, it is often because the thoughts are becoming a challenge to our beliefs, perceptions, or value system.

You will experience this most likely as a gentle nudge that something is not right. It becomes an internal signal and repeats until it finally may appear as unbearable or unmanageable.

Then it becomes plausible that most will start to seek outside assistance as we grow less content with the process that is uncomfortable and possibly misinterpreted for years.

Why Do I Do That?

What To Do

The brain is wired to protect and serve. The reality of our lives, in part, is created by what we see, feel, and hear.

We have five senses, each is of importance, but these three are so very significant to the formation that we decide to create our reality from.

If one believes something strongly, it shapes our entire outlook on life as we know it and experiences it.

Now on to the exercise at hand. It is taken in part from a form of neuroplasticity, along with the strategy from a Hawaiian view on living, and runs along with Neuro-Linguistic Programming principles which I find valuable along with my integrative study to assist clients within my practice.

Deciding To Release And Rewire

This exercise may appear to be a bit silly, but it may also allow creative, clear and transformative positive effects for you.

In part, the exercise allows for one to make peace with and suggest the brain to release unwanted and unnecessary programs running in the background of our mind.

We forgive many people in our lives, but we take little to no time offering the same forgiveness to ourselves. I have found, once inquiring the act of “self” forgiveness for my clients, that the concept was unfamiliar at best, vague or non-existent.

This is sad for me to realize, as our very own consciousness needs some forgiving. The placebo effect of looking yourself in the eye with an intention to change some thoughts, and possible blocks that are holding us hostage in our lives needs be of strong intent or this exercise may have little effect other than to look at the external face for more reason to find flaws.

Which, by the way, are another basis for perception, deception, and self-loathe. A completely new inspiration for me to write another article based on this idea!

In my private practice, I use a strategy that is termed, “timeline therapy.” This is a shortcut to utilize the same premise. Please bear in mind that the following exercise is not created to solve all the issues you are holding inside all at once.

Rather, you must follow the steps of determining the negative thought and choosing to manage or eradicate each one at a time.

The exercise if proficient and useful, must be repeated if you have more than one definition that is plaguing you at a time. Staying focused on one pattern or cycle is enough at a time.

Finding The Negative

Positive Negative

Believe me, it’s in there. It is valuable to spend some time on the detective work so that you will be able to identify the maladaptive thought and name it. Find the one thing that you really sum it up as for your descriptive word.

Such as, “I have told myself to believe that I am_________.” (Unworthy, or undeserving whatever you can sum it up as) really identify that negative part.

From experiences, you will learn that we respond in a certain way to get through something and as such we often use the words “I am”. So, let us use a different phrase if the first one did not do it for you. “I generally feel that I am______________.”

Got it? Good. Now go to the mirror. In your bathroom, bedroom or wherever that you decide that is private and safe for you to use at the moment.


Here are the suggestions for your interpretation. I suggest you use your own words to follow the bulleted words that must be said to self in this order only. This is important for your success.

You must not change the bold print words. The other words may be your own. Finding and using your own vocabulary is important because that is how your brain knows you to speak.

Hence, it has no choice but to not listen to your input. Look yourself in the eye.

“I’m Sorry”

Think about how you may have instilled this word (the one you found the definition to describe the issue) of thought and belief that is now holding you back from a more abundantly positive life.

It may sound like or even be the exact word you chose about yourself from the previous suggestion above. The more exact you can become the better.

“Please forgive me”

I am deciding to give the part of me holding on to this belief coming from my own thought process the permission to release. I realize that I have been holding on to this belief for a long time.

Even though it may have been needed at one time, it is no longer needed and is not serving me now. However, please forgive me that I have been choosing to go back to this negative place in the past.

“Thank you.”

Thank You

Thank that part of you that this willing now to release that feeling, thought, or belief that has been holding on to, but ready now to give up by your internal command

“I love you.”

Yes, it is important to love ourselves. Totally, and without judgement. We do this so freely many times in our lives for others.
You are choosing now to mentally release and break the cycle of negativity and instil love and respect in its place for yourself moving forward from this place

As you apply this to your life, reflect on the time in your past when you first instilled this negative thought probably most likely used it for protection of self, or from experiencing something that was upsetting to us.

Once you can uncover through discovery, where the negativity originated, then slowly move forward from there thinking about how you used this same learned negative resource, although it was not a great help, you may have applied the very same behaviour to incidents through different times of your life.

For example, learned the idea about myself, (it’s that descriptive word you found) because someone told me (discovery) that I was dumb.

Now, going forward I see that I used this resource state of belief when I was ten years old. I failed on an important exam because I thought I was dumb not consciously, but subconsciously.

Again, I may have used this very internal thought to get through a college exam and failed because I believed I was dumb, and therefore not able to pass it.

Later, you may have added to it by feeling incapable and created, even more, energy around the thought.

Feeling Incapable

It may have grown to validation and now adding “I give up, I am not worthy of being smart.” Are you able to comprehend where I am going with this? It may have even affected you today! “I am too dumb to know how to cook as well as Aunt Martha.”

“Oh, the tangled web we weave, once we first learn to deceive.” I am not certain who said this phrase, but my Mother repeated instilled this as a life lesson for us children.

I am certain it has kept me honest. See how internalizing works so well? I must laugh now at how my subconscious just popped that one memory out for your benefit! Mother would be proud.

Virtually any habit can be changed in four easy steps such as in this suggested exercise to rewire the thoughts that are not needed and may even be causing you harm to replace them then with a more positive outcome choice.

Purging and updating your internal “hard drive” is freeing, and feels lighter as we release the baggage. Be present now, and move forward from the negative influences on to more positive ones for your life.

Read More: If You Are Feeling Low, Ask This Question To Yourself

Releasing The Negative

“You are not your brain.”
~ Dr. Jeffery Swartz

“Man is ignorant of the influences that act upon him and being ignorant of the cause is constantly Liable to cause the effect of them.”
~ Phineas Parhurst Quimbly

“You are able to envision life the way you want it, and if it resonates with your natural being, it will appear as a true possibility for you, and is then is able to be created by using your beautiful mind to allow it to become your reality.”
~ Davidene Bender-Main International Master Neuro Linguistic Practitioner and founder of Phenix NLP.

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Contributor : Davidene Bender-Main (Consumer Health Digest)

This Article Has Been Published on December 5, 2017 and Last Modified on October 1, 2018

Davidene Bender-Main is a Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming serving others by working with clients on specifically tailored sessions by private practice, and virtual online sessions. Along with sessions, Davidene offers motivational interviewing, meditation instruction, informative group meetings, brainwave work, and is a published author. Neuro-Linguistic Programming is well suited to manage issues occurring within a non-clinical environment and without medication. Davidene is easily found on social media, and through her two and also you can connect with her on Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, and Pinterest.

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